Questions: How to maintain love, happiness and peace in the family?
Answer: The main impediments in any relationship is when a person
wants things to happen his way only. He wants his words to hold
weight, his desires to be fulfilled or wants everything for his own
self interest.
When one thinks about the other person, and doing good to the other
person, by honoring and providing comfort to them, and wishing them
well and imbibing in thoughts of their welfare, then all members of
the family become happy.
Question: What is the primary reasons for fights in a household?
Answer: Generally within every household there are fights primarily
due to two reasons
1) The other person should do all the work, earn money, make a
living and bearing all the expenses and
2) I will do the spending, shopping etc. I am to receive all the rest,
respect, and all glories come to me.
From these two points, most of the troubles begin. If these were to be
reversed, that is, I do all the work and you relax and rest. That
respect, hospitality, admiration, happiness are not taken, rather they
are given. If such things are done amongst each other — giving of
respect, admiration, rest, relaxation,carrying out orders, making
others happiness etc., then love will surely increase.
Question: How to be truly gratified in a family life?
Answer: Man’s nature is such that he likes the fulfillment of his
desires. When things happen according to his desires, he feels happy.
There is desire for wealth, respect, fame, and to live a full life.
But of all of these desires, the main desire is that what ever my mind
desires, that should happen. This is not something that one should
feel good about. If we give up the insistence of our mind, and if we
do what others desire, then we will become gratified for
life. Only two things we have to watch out for, that whatever others
are asking us to do, is rightful and just (nyaayukt) and we have the
ability to fulfill that desire.
Question: What must one do to attain this gratification, this peace
and harmony in family life?
Answer: For this, there is a straightforward solution. Just decide
once and for all, that we are not going to take anything from this
world — we are only going to serve this world. The reason to serve
this world is because we have taken a lot from this world in the past,
so now it is time to give back in return. We have to give the family,
to the world, not take from it.
If members live lovingly with one another, the atmosphere will be full
of peace and happiness and love evolves automatically by renunciation
of selfishness and pride.
From “Jivan Upyogi Pravachan ” in Hindi by Swami Ramsukhdasji pg 34
For full online discourses in Hindi, please visit Swami
Ramsukhdasji’s website. http://www.swamiramsukhdasji.org